Today’s poem has been chosen and introduced by Teacher of English, Mr Galloway.

I’m teaching a play called The History Boys to my Year 13 English Literature class at the moment. You may have read it or seen the film version? It’s a very funny play about a group of bright Sixth Form students and their struggles to get into good universities. One of their teachers, Hector, is very idealistic and wants the boys to think of literature and poetry as a personal and private thing, not as knowledge to be trotted out in order to pass exams. At one point he says, ‘I consider examinations the enemy of education’.

What do you think about this? Are exams the enemy of education? Or are they an important part of preparing you for your life after school? Have you ever asked your teacher: ‘is this going to be on the exam?’ Exams are a particularly tricky topic at the moment, as the government has had to decide to cancel examinations yet again for many students in the UK. At FHS we’ve also been unable to host the regular 11+ examinations for new entrants too. I’m sure you all remember what it was like to prepare for those. Were they important and helpful ways of motivating you to learn? Or did they intimidate you and stop you from enjoying your education?

In this poem, by Brian Patten (a close contemporary of Roger McGough), he considers his own response to the questions I’ve posed above. I wonder what you think of it.

The Minister For Exams

When I was a child I sat an exam.
This test was so simple
There was no way I could fail.

Q1. Describe the taste of the Moon.It tastes like Creation I wrote,
it has the flavour of starlight.

Q2. What colour is Love?

Love is the colour of the water a man
lost in the desert finds, I wrote.

Q3. Why do snowflakes melt?

I wrote, they melt because they fall
on to the warm tongue of God.

There were other questions.
They were as simple.

I described the grief of Adam
when he was expelled from Eden.
I wrote down the exact weight of
an elephant’s dream

Yet today, many years later,
For my living I sweep the streets
or clean out the toilets of the fat
hotels.

Why? Because constantly I failed
my exams.
Why? Well, let me set a test.

Q1. How large is a child’s
imagination?
Q2. How shallow is the soul of the
Minister for exams?